On the wall
I am my mother
As a child, I teased my mother when she said “my heart is full” and she would get emotional over the smallest of moments. Today, as I sat snuggled up with my little man I felt my heart overflowing with this intense love and gratitude for that moment. No one was here to witness it, just SBR and I sharing this moment. I kissed his little cheek and he smiled ear to ear. I felt so lucky to have this blessing and this time with him.
I thought back to a time just a little over a year ago, when I thought having a child would not happen for me. When I would go to bed each night thinking of my angel babies and aching for a baby in my arms. I thought of those nights I would sit in my bathtub and weep and question where He was when I needed Him. I thought about how empty I felt. And now– now, I have my arms full of this bundle of joy, my face is full of smiles and happy tears, and my heart is beyond full of love, happiness, and gratitude.
I can no longer tease my mother, because I have become her. I have a deep understanding of her saying “my heart is full” and the emotions that follow those moments that most would think as just those everyday moments. Somehow, those moments seem so much sweeter when you think you’ll never have them.
In short, My heart is full!
Thank you for filling my heart with Your love, Your blessing, Your grace. I am grateful. Amen.
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