Absence

I’ve been absent in my writing for a while. There has been so much going on, that I just couldn’t decide what to write about.

First, Miles’ grandfather passed away in February. This put us through a strain we’d not yet had to encounter. When someone is ill, I’ve decided that God is our Ultimate Healer, and that the ill are better off in His comforting hands. Miles takes another approach. He closes off, he gets very agitated easily, and he struggles to finish a task or thought. The day we found out his grandfather wasn’t doing well, Miles snapped at me repeatedly. My first instinct was to be defensive. I’m already an emotional person, and then add pregnancy hormones to the mix, and well, it’s a recipe for disaster. I prayed that I would be able to support him through this trying time, and as I always do when things get tough, I called my mom.  Grandpa Charlie did pass, and Miles and I survived the stress that comes from such a loss. Part of me thinks, we even came out a little stronger.

Next, we hit a milestone. We reached weeks 30, 31, 32, and 33! We’ve had healthy checkups for both me and the baby. My blood pressure has been great and his heartbeat is strong. We are growing so quickly and it amazes me every day. What’s more is that we got to take a class on the birthing process and Miles really took all of the information very serious. We’ve also started a class on newborn care. I’ve been dreaming about Ray’s sweet little face. I’ve also been preparing our home for his arrival.  It seems like a dream that we get to prepare our home and our hearts to have this sweet blessing. I tell Ray everyday that he is an answered prayer, a blessing, and a dream come true. I’m just so excited; I want to scream from the rooftop, “I’m going to be a MOM!”

This week, I’ve been on spring break, so I’ve really been focusing on getting the house prepared for baby and the visitors that will follow. I’ve cleaned out about every inch of our house, scrubbed bathrooms, organized closets, and set up the bassinet next to our bed. I love waking every morning to see the bassinet there and knowing that in a few short weeks it will hold our little blessing. There was a time not so long ago that I was sure that I would never have a baby of my own, and I was trying to prepare my heart for the route of adoption. It is amazing to me that if you ask for God’s favor, you will receive it. I pray constantly that he continue to bless us with a healthy baby, a healthy delivery, and the means to provide for our growing family.

Next weekend, we will have our 2nd baby shower, and I continue to feel blessed and excited. We have been given so many gifts and I am so grateful for EVERYTHING. Our baby is so loved already, and he isn’t even here. It puts my heart and mind at ease.

Dear God,

Thank you for the blessing of this healthy baby. Thank you for the gifts that have been giving to help us prepare for our baby. You are so good! My heart is full and I sing your praises. Amen.

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