Our first baby

I remember being at a party, and a man walked up to me and said very matter-of-factually, ” You’re pregnant.” I laughed, and replied, ” I’m fairly certain I am not.” Miles and I had begun talking about starting our family in the next year or so, but nothing definite. I’m a planner, and after much research, I decided I would start taking prenatal vitamins to prepare for the pregnancy… whenever that would be.

The school year was starting, and I was crazy busy preparing for my new students. It was my second year, and I felt as if THIS year, I would have a clue as to what I was doing. Miles called while at work, and said that his kidney was bothering him, and he thought he had a kidney stone. His doctor ordered him to consume plenty of fluids, especially cranberry juice. We had none at home, but I needed to go to Target for some supplies for school, so I told him we’d go and pick some up when we went that evening. On a whim, I also grabbed my very first pregnancy test.

While at Target, Miles was pale and in pain. He decided he would wait in the car for me. I tried to quickly finish up my shopping and get him home. On the way home, the “check engine” light came on in my car. Miles was moaning in pain. I was stressed about all of my “To Do’s”. I remember thinking,” What else???”

We got home, and I decided that I would take the test. This would ease my mind about what that man said to me the week before, and then I could focus on the other things I needed to do and take care of my poor hubby. As I sat and waited for the results, a million thought ran through my mind at once— were WE ready? Was I ready? Was he ready? How would we pay for all of the expenses? What would I do for childcare? It was what seemed like an eternity wrapped in 3 minutes, and there are on the screen read the word “PREGNANT”.  I felt ill with worry. Could I really go though my observation year at school and be a good mom? Could we really afford to have a baby? Money was tight as it was, how would we swing it?

Immediately, I felt guilty for feeling so worried about it. This was a blessing, and it was ours, but I felt so scared and nervous. Crying, I went into the living room where Miles was balled up and nearly crying from pain. I blubbered,”Honey…We’re pregnant. I’m so scared. How are we gonna do this? Are we ready?” Miles tried to smile, as he said,” Really?Well, I guess we’ll have to be. We’ll figure it out. I hope it’s a boy.” I snuggled up with him on the couch for a few minutes, but with my mind racing,I couldn’t just lay there.

I went into the bedroom to call my mom. When everything seems like it’s getting out of control, she always seems to be able to pull my out of my pit of worry. “Hey Mom…” I say trying to hide my tears. She knew immediately something was wrong. I couldn’t hold it back any longer and I sobbed,” Mom, I’m pregnant. I’m scared. Miles is passing a kidney stone. The car needs to be checked out. What if I’m not ready? What if I’m not going to be a good mom?”

She stopped me, and tried not to let on to my family what I just said to her. She was so excited! She told me it was okay to feel nervous. She told me everything would work out. I went to bed that night trying to remember her words, and calm myself.

I called my doctor the next day to schedule a confirmation appointment. They couldn’t get me in for another 3 1/2 weeks. That seemed like forever! But, I took the appointment. I let my assistant know my “secret”, and asked her not to say anything until after our first appointment.

With the start of school, the weeks FLEW by. Our first appointment came, and I couldn’t wait. My mom went with me since Miles was unable to make it because of his work schedule. They did all of the normal things, and then, they took me into the ultrasound room. I couldn’t wait to see my baby. It showed up on the screen, and the doctor directed my eye. She pointed to this little peanut shaped things, and announced,”There’s your baby!” I couldn’t wait to show the baby to Miles! She took some measurements and gave us a due date. April 18th. I was pleased. That meant I could be finished with my observations for my certification and still be out for maternity leave. AND, if I worked it just right, I could go out for Spring break, and be home with the baby until the upcoming school year started.

Everything seemed to be on track. I went to my regular check ups. Miles was able to make it to a few. My weight never went up, but, the doctor said she thought it would just come on later. I suffered from terrible morning, noon and night sickness, and my appetite was next to nothing. When I did eat, I was really trying to be more health conscious; I was not only caring for myself but for my sweet little one.

Before we knew it, it was Thanksgiving. It was our year to go to Ohio to spend the holiday with Miles’ family. They were so excited to see my belly, and talk about the baby and baby names. I was nearly 20 weeks by that point, and still hadn’t gained a pound. I was still wearing my regular clothes though a “BellaBand” was necessary because I couldn’t close my pants. My sweet father-in-law surprised us with a gorgeous crib and changing table. I couldn’t wait to get it home, and start preparing for our little one.
On our trip home the Sunday after Thanksgiving, Miles and I discussed baby names. The next day we would be finding out the sex of our baby. I liked the names Abby, Elliot,and several others for a girl. For a boy, we would name him after Miles’ great grandfather, Sandtford Raymond. We’d pretty much agreed on Abby for a girl, but were debating on a middle name. We went to work the next day, with such high expectations….

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